Mum reality: How we are unconsciously creating an unattainable illusion.

I’m not talking about perfect Insta feeds or carefully crafted Facebook posts. They do play a part but I’m talking about something else. I’m talking about how mums are rounding – making things sound better than they actually are.

 

Last week I started pondering bed sheets… more precise, how regularly does a family with young kids wash their bedsheets?

 

I looked up some statistics…

 

A survey on buzzfeed showed (on the date I visited the site) that almost half of the people surveyed washed their sheets once a month or longer. I’m not about to tell you about how important sheet washing is. More about the conversations I was having with mums. When I spoke to mothers asking them about this topic, their first answer always sounded lovely but their second answer was always closer to the reality.

 

I asked mums about how often they wash their sheets, below is an example of how it went down;

 

Me: “Heya… quick question for a blog I’m pondering, How often do you wash your sheets?”

Her “Probably Weekly”

Me: “Okay… well, I’m writing a blog about mums rounding reality, saying things are more often or better… would you agree… even slightly?”

Her: “Hahaha… yeah… I probably more fortnightly, if I’m lucky”

 

Rounding is not limited to bed sheets…

What about the food we feed our kids?

How often we use cloth/desposible nappies?

How much the kids are sleeping at night?

This could be applied to every parenting aspect.

 

If we are always ‘rounding’… this is a problem.

 

It creates an illusion of reality, it creates false and unattainable expectations. This feeds into Mama Comparison Guilt and in an ideal world this illusion wouldn’t bother or influence us, as we would feel confident in our own parenting decisions. Unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world and I work with a lot of mums dealing with guilt, lack of confidence and a deep desire to fit in and meeting the illusion of the reality we are creating.

 

Let’s make an effort to be honest and stop ‘rounding’.

It’s unhelpful, it’s lying and it doesn’t serve anyone in the long run.

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